I Regret

Let me start the post with a quote I read : ‘Don’t Regret the things that you did, because you felt they were right when you did them’. What a bunch of bullshit!

Words and Actions once dished out are not easily taken back or forgotten, are they? This post is something I have been wanting to write all my life, well not all my life, since the time I started hurting people. Since the time I started realizing I was hurting people.

ALL of us have hurt someone at some point or another. And We have done it hundreds of times. Some just do it in passing and get a kick out of it, Some do it by being brutally honest and Some just do it so that it hurts. And I have been all three.

And What I have come to realize is that the closer you get to people, the more opportunity you give yourself to hurt them. When was the last time you sneered at a Very Poor And Distasteful Joke(vPdJ) that your second cousin’s uncle cracked. You either pretentiously laughed out loud or sported a lovely smile. Had your father uttered the same joke, would you have reacted the same. You would keep quiet and added it to the list of things to be talked about when going back home in the car. It gets even more twisted in the case of a couple. To the World And To you, You are a couple, You are not A and B anymore and that broadens the scope of hurtdom.

Anyway, Coming to the topic, ‘I Regret’, I sincerely regret some of the things I have uttered and it hurts every time I think of them. I don’t need to dig them up to think about them, they float around aimlessly in my brain during those moments of near zero CPU Activity.

I Regret having said “Whoever knows about this college, And you have joined this college, haha” to that akka who wanted to hear my wishes after getting admission to her engineering college.

I Regret having said “Whose mistake do you think it was” when that anna was telling me about a grave accident in which he was involved wherein a life was actually lost.

I Regret having brushed away and mocked a song suggested by one of my friends just because I felt he lacked taste? The same song that played in my car stereo today that I sung along with.

I Regret not having turned the mixer from shower to tap mode and mocking my grandmother when she got wet from the shower. It hurts a little every day I enter the bathroom to take a shower.

I Regret the meeting we had in our office when I complained of the lack of privacy in our mall-style restrooms. How silly of me it was to take that up.

I Regret being rude and sporting a ‘holier-than-thou’ attitude to friends whom I shared my room with.

I Regret that time when I over-sped and my car mirror hit a two wheeler. The ‘What If’ question keeps cropping up and kills me every time it makes an appearance.

And As always, the closest come last, because they can take it and you take them for granted?

Anyway, I Regret having said all the things that I said to my wife. After everything that I threw to her, not that she held back, She stuck with me seeing the good in me. And see how beautifully that has turned out. As I am typing this, my 8 month old son is trying to stand on my laptop monitor J.

And I forgot about my parents. They know!